You're Too Close!

Thank goodness for biking. I can still get out on the roads and trails I love, experience the dawning spring, and pretend that all is well in the world, which it isn't.

Obviously, I think about you-know-what a lot as I ride. Can bikers catch the virus from each other? How close do they need to be for the virus to be transmitted?

Let's say the virus is a gas, or at least gas-like, carried by exhaled aerosols. A gas will will disperse quite quickly in the great outdoors. How quickly? Hm. Do we have other personal gasses that need to disperse? How long do they take?

The answer, of course, is yes: Farts. Farts are gasses that we wish to have dispersed as quickly as possible, and for which we have outstanding detection monitors built right in to our noses.

So do bikers' farts spread from biker to biker? Not really. In all my days of riding with other people, I can't recall a situation in which I was aware of the fart of another person. Unless one drafts tight against the person ahead, and unless there's a tailwind that exactly matches one's velocity, making the air virtually still, I think there is virtually no transmission of farts between bikers.

So here's my new motto, one which I will allow the CDC to use:

If you can smell my farts, you're too close.